


Reminiscing on the start

by Ballumblog



Category: EastEnders
Genre: Coming Out, First Time, First Times, Fluff, Implied Smut, M/M, Pride
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-04-25
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:34:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23837653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ballumblog/pseuds/Ballumblog
Summary: One of the things we never see on screen is characters talking about the past in detail so here’s my take on a conversation that MUST of happened between Ben and CallumBen and Callum talking about their first time and Pride
Relationships: Ben mitchell & Callum (halfway) Highway, Callum "Halfway" Highway/Ben Mitchell
Comments: 2
Kudos: 48





	Reminiscing on the start

It’s 9am. Ben and Callum are lying in bed facing each other in post morning sex bliss. Ben turns to his bedside table to grab his phone, reading the message that just pinged. 

‘Mums just text’ he began to Callum, ‘the Council have cancelled pride already. Said that even if lockdown is over by then, they can’t guarantee they will be Able to police the event’. 

He quickly writes out a reply then turns back to face Callum. 

‘You ok about that?’ Callum asks slowly raising his hand to stroke Bens cheek as Ben leans into the touch.

‘Was thinking it was going to be cancelled to be honest, just a shame really. Would of been nice to take you to your first pride and I want to make up for the shit show that was last year... DON’T even think about apologising’ he quickly adds, knowing Callum was about to say sorry for his brothers actions ‘that was not your fault’. 

They both stared at each other for a minute, not saying anything both clearly thinking. Ben was the first to break the silence. 

‘How did Stuart find out about us?’ 

‘I.. ermm I told him’ Callum replies, stuttering a bit. ‘He saw us, you know after you beat my dad up? And I guess he put two and two together. Looking back, I don’t think I was very subtle’ Callum laughed slightly.

‘Sorry’ Ben replied ‘that was definitely my fault then.’ 

‘No Ben, if I can’t apologise for Stuart nearly killing you, you can’t apologise for comforting me when I was hurting. What you said about my Dad that day... it really opened my eyes. Definitely helped me come out in October so, Thank you and, beating aside, I think it was a blessing in disguise Stuart knowing. Once one person knew, I kind of felt like I was already sort of out then. In the back of my mind I knew it was only a matter of time’. 

Ben smiled at that shuffling closer to Callum and giving him a peck before resuming his position. 

‘Also, this year wouldn’t of been my first pride. I did end up going last year. I worked at the Albert. Don’t know if you remember forcing me?’ Callum gives Ben a look and Ben laughed. 

‘Yer but I bet you didn’t feel very proud then?’ Ben enquired. No malice in his question. 

‘No, I distinctly remember crying to a drag queen singing Proud’ he laughs in spite of the horrible memory.‘What a mess things were back then?’ Callum states ‘seeing you was absolute torture half of the time, I didn’t know whether to punch you or kiss you’.

‘I made your life hell Callum, I really am truly sorry for all of the shit back then. I would never of outed you either, just me being a insensitive prick as per usual.’ Ben smirked a little then added‘and I definitely wanted to do more than kiss you every time I saw you. You should of seen my Grindr matches after the first time in the park, all clones of you I’m telling you. It’s only really now I realise what I was doing’. 

Callum laughs at that. Before thinking back to that time and frowning slightly. Ben continues 

‘That night at pride, Stuart text me on your phone. I thought it was you coming for round two. I had been talking to a guy in the Albert, he went to the toilet and I got your your text. Didn’t even wait for him to come back. Was so excited for another round with you’ Ben then takes a turn stroking Callum’s cheek as he continues ‘ it was then I realised this wasn’t just sex. When I saw it wasn’t you that had text I was gutted. I knew that whatever we had couldn’t just stop at the park and to be honest, that’s why I distanced myself from you after that. Stopped pestering you. I knew I was in too deep already’. 

‘Wow... that’s...A lot’ Callum replied looking at Bens eyes ‘I didn’t know Stuart had taken my phone, I didn’t even know he knew my password’ Callum finished with a quizzical look ok his face.

‘Babe, your password is your birthday it isn’t hard’ Ben laughed as Callum rolled his eyes. 

‘That first night in the park was everything Ben. I couldn’t think straight for a full week after that’ 

Ben bites back a comment on the use of ‘straight’ not wanting to kill the vibe. 

‘I just kept thinking. Why doesn’t it feel like this with Whitney? and that I was never going to feel that way again. Little did I know ey’ Callum laughed ‘I was tingling all over my body. Every time someone touched me in a place you touched, even just my hand it sizzled and I was taken back to it. I went to get my hair cut and when the lady had her hands in my hair I was thinking about you guiding my head and teaching me how to suck you off. Even when I got down on one knee to propose to Whitney, my knees were sore from being on my knees for you. It really was so overwhelming and very confusing.’

Ben stared at Callum gulping slowly but not wanting to interrupt. 

‘I remember the first time I had sex with Whitney and it was... good obviously. I mean, I was a 27 year old virgin of course it was good’ he laughed ‘but that first time for us I just knew this is how it was supposed to feel. I remember her going down on me and me closing my eyes looking up at the ceiling. With you, I literally couldn’t keep my eyes off you and my mouth was watering with the anticipation to do it back to you.’

‘Well your mouth was made for sucking dick babe’ Ben lightened the tone a little stroking Callum’s cheek in comfort. Callum laughed and continued 

‘The night of mine and Whitney’s engagement I couldn’t even have sex with her. I was rock hard, but it was at the thought of you and I felt awful. I ran to the bathroom and was sick and I honestly think the only time in those few months I didn’t feel sick was when I was around you, even if you were tormenting me’ 

‘I.. I don’t even know what to say Callum. I love you so much. I’m so sorry you had to go through all of that’ Ben exclaimed stroking Callum’s hair now. ‘Obviously I have had quite a lot of sex but that night, we only exchanged blow jobs and hand jobs and I hadn’t felt that good since... since Paul. It was quite a lot for me to handle too. Hence why I decided to torment you instead. I definitely hadn’t processed exactly what I was feeling for you at that point but, when you announced you had proposed my heart literally sank. I couldn’t understand why I felt so bad either.’ Ben carries on stoking Callum’s hair then moves down to his arm 

‘I’m glad I made an impact on you then though, glad you were thinking of me constantly, that was very much reciprocated. And If you had asked, I would of got down on my knees in the vic toilets that next day you proposed’ He laughs and continues ‘imagine if we had gone all the way that night, if we had had a bed. Poor little baby gay Callum would not of known what hit him’. 

‘God Ben even now I find it overwhelming being inside you, I actually don’t know what I would of done back then. I came very fast that night as it was’ Callum laughed and cringed.

‘Yes I distinctly remember you completely losing control, fucking my mouth without asking and cumming down my throat very hard’ Ben gives Callum a look laughing ‘it’s a good job I have you trained now isn’t it?’ 

‘Or maybe you are just losing your touch?’ Callum teased. 

‘You were not saying that about 30 minutes ago babe, and I still have the taste of your jizz in my mouth to prove it’ Ben replies back before climbing on top of Callum and kissing him passionately. 

Callum pulls away slightly, placing both his hand over Bens cheeks 

‘I love you so much, those times were an absolute mess but it’s lead us here and I have never been more happy’ he exclaims before leaning back in for a kiss slowly grinding up into Ben. 

‘Pride 2021 won’t know what’s hit it with you out and proud babe. I’m very excited to see it.’ Ben ends their conversation before descending Callum’s body to come face to face with his dick. ‘Now you have permission this time to fuck my mouth and come down my throat, let’s see how long you can last’.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think and if you have an fic recs My tumblr is BallumBlog 
> 
> Thanks for reading x


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